Burnout to breakthrough

Because it's not just about self-care and rest

So here’s the thing.

If you’ve been struggling with the amount of stuff that the people around you; family, friends, work colleagues have been loading onto your already crumbling and exhausted shoulders, then perhaps ask yourself if they’re doing it because you’ve set their expectations of you too high?

I mean, there are exceptions; there are sharks and there are dolphins. And if you’re a dolphin, then you can bet that there’s a shark out there tying a metaphorical napkin around its neck and licking its lips in anticipation of taking a delicious great chunk out of you.

But, most irritatingly (while at the same time, liberatingly), we are in charge of the expectations that others have of us; we train people how to treat us. 

We’re also in charge of the expectations that we have of ourselves. And to put it reasonably succinctly - the ‘what we do’ part of this equation is pretty simple to understand. It’s the ‘why we do it’ part that can confound.

Because the story of our internalised and externally applied expectations doesn’t start at the point of those expectations, the story starts a long, long time ago (and possibly in a galaxy far, far away).

And it comes down to Energy.

Energy is like a seesaw, it’s like water, it’s like chaos. It is always seeking to fill a void, it’s always seeking to find a level. It’s always looking for entropy. And if we present ourselves the way that the world (gee, thanks for that, Patriarchy) ‘expects’ us to, then unless we follow all of the rules: work hard, shut up, put up, be grateful for what you’ve got in case you lose it, beat the next person before they beat you, etc. then all hell breaks loose. 

Or things change. Which can, to the exhausted eye, look exactly the same. 

And that change terrifies us. Especially when we’re tired, or burnt out, or vulnerable, or just… inexperienced.

We come into this world with our own energetic blueprints. But those blueprints are moulded and influenced and based upon the energetic blueprints of our forebears. BTW, if you don’t believe me, Google ‘Epigenetics’ and then we’ll talk.

Go on, I’ll wait.

So… we come into this world in a certain way. Which means that the Universe, chaos, energy, life force etc. needs to fill the rest of the void, to compensate for the stuff we can’t, or don’t know how to do yet. This has to happen in order for it to find an energetic balance.

Putting the more esoteric stuff to one side for a minute, let’s talk real life: because I don’t know anyone who isn’t starting this year at least a little bit burnt out.

We’ve all been trying so hard, for so long. Maybe we’ve got something to show for it, maybe we haven’t. Sh*t got weird (if it wasn’t already) a few years back, and the ‘new normal’ is nothing of the sort.

And whatever results we’ve got, or not got, the energy that it’s taken to get us where we are right now has been extensive, and expensive and exhausting.

I know that I’ve been quiet. For various reasons, I burnt out hard a while back. And for the last few months, I’ve been doing all of the things you’re supposed to do to overcome burnout. But while I was doing that, and just not feeling as better as I would have liked, I realised something important… and this might be obvious to you, but it certainly wasn’t to me.

Recovering from burnout isn’t just about rest. It’s not just about self-care. It’s not just about journalling, and physical and mental health intervention - although all of those things are important.

It’s also about an energetic reset.

If you’re still functioning from the place where you created the burnout in the first place, then going back to that same place after a bit of time out and some lifestyle adjustments is just going to set you up for more of the same.

You have to reset your set point, so that you can take action from a place where burnout isn’t even a thing.

So that’s what I’ve been doing, and continue to do. 

I wish that I could say that my evolution has been a purely cerebral thing. But as with everything, apparently, in order to be able to talk about things in any kind of useful way, I have to experience them extremely viscerally first.

Rude.

Anyway, see you soon,

A
xx